Caption Competition Week 3!

This is a Caption Competition, in which we make funny captions for the image above, the winners get points so do it for your house or the mere glory, just do it.
GO!

Hermione: Harry, he's not coming.
Harry: Yes he is, damnit! He is! He is!
Hermione: No, he's not.
Harry: He will!
Hermione: Ugh, help me out here, Ronald?
Ron: Why won't you wait for me like that, my dearest?
Hermione: Like what?
Ron (whimpers): Harry?
Harry: ... fire.

Ron: I'm bored!
Hermione: Really?
Ron:Yes, and staring at your hair isn't helping much.
Harry:Shhhhhhh.
Ron & Hermoine: What!!??
Harry: I want to touch it.
Hermione: Touch what?
Harry:.... fire.

Harry: "Just look at that! The way those flames burst into different colors and move is just so-- so-- er... Intriguing!"
Hermione: "If I'm not mistake, which I rarely am, Godric Gryffindor was the first one to ever create fire."
Ron: "How do know so much useless information?! Seriously- if you were confronted by Voldemort, would you really care if, 'Godric Gryffindore was the first one to ever create fire?' Honestly, that doesn't help you out at all."
Harry: "I think I just saw a white flame there for a second!"

~*~

Harry: "Why does everything have to happen to me? I am so tired of Voldemort this, and Voldemort that. I just want to die."
Hermione: "Harry, I support you and so does Ron."
Ron: "You are a sick, sick person, Hermione. I most certainly do not support Harry and his decision to kill himself."

All: "I'm so hungry,"
Hermione: "I'm so hungry that it aches almost as bad as that time I forgot to take my menstrual potion... Why in Merlin's name did we skip dinner?"
Ron: "I'm so hungry that even your hair looks nice, Hermione!"
Harry: "Well, I'm so hungry that I'd eat... I'd eat... those flaming logs!"
All: [think]
Ron: "Logs, you say..."
All: [loom] [eat flaming logs]
Hermione: "You know, I get the distinct feeling that we're forgetting something..."
Harry: "Shut up Hermione and eat your damn log!"
Sirius: [far away, his head in a firegrate] "What the hell? Is the common room fire out? I was supposed to be fire-calling that adorable angsty godson of mine tonight..."

-

[thinking]
Hermione: "Oooooh, Harry's dressing-gown looks so delectable right now..."
Ron: "There she goes again, swooning over that damn Potter... Why can't she look at me like that? Why?! Maybe if I turned angsty, had a tragic past, wore glasses, got a conspicuous cut on my forehead and ran around with hair that screamed 'I'm a hero! I shall save the day and rid the world of all evil and look damn sexy whilst doing so!' she'd pay more attention to me..."
Harry: "Heh... fire... heh..."