102 Ways To Annoy Severus Snape!

Number Twenty-sis: Tell him you have a dark side then start singing Sweeny Todd songs. Loudly.

Number Twenty-sever: Make him sing with you

Number Twenty-ight: Tell him you won't rest until you get your pie. You need pie and his palor face obviously shows he hasn't had one recently. You demand he gets you both pie. Pecan Pie, to be precise.

Number Twenty-loin: You then go on a pie-rant... "Pie. Mmm, pie. Mmm pie yum. Where pie?"

Number Firty: When he is talking to other profesors, rush up and scream, "Pie? Oh, Sevie! I need some... You know pie." Then just stand there. Waiting for your pie.

Number Furtive one: When he is talking to other profesors, rush up and scream, "Give it to me! Give to me, Severus!" Then just stand there. Waiting for him to give 'it' to you. Smile.

Number Orta Took: Smile and laugh when he gives 'it' to you. That rhaspberry pie was marvelous, but not the pecan you wanted. Start whining about how that wasn't your favorite kind... And he better have it soon (he has to guess your favorite).

Number Thrifty-thieve: Throw cream pies at him when he guesses wrong.

Number Orty Or: try to eat the cherry that landed on his nose. Then when he thinks you are about to eat his face off, shove another pie on his face and retreat.

Number I-really-can't-tell-anymore: Pretend to be an airplane. Fly around him. Constantly.

Number Shirty-sis: Lock him in a room with Sirius Black, but take away their wands.

Number Flirty-Nun: Call him Severus.

Reaction: Snape out loud: "If I'm not mistaken I'm still your teacher and you're still my student. And even when that won't be the case anymore, there is no way that I'll ever allow you to refer to me on a first-name basis. 20 points from your House!"

If you're brave, call him Sev.

Reaction: "-Then can I call you, Sev?" "-50 points!"

If you're really brave, call him 'Sevvie-kins'.

Reaction: "-Ok then, Sevvie-kins maybe?" "-75 points!"

If you're suicidal, call him 'precious-little-Sevvie-kins'

Reaction: "Why won't you let me call you that my precious-little Sevvie-kins?" "-That's it! 100 points PLUS a week's worth of the most horrible detention I can think of! Now, my precious-little-twit, do you feel I'm giving you enough attention or are you still lacking some? Because if you are still lacking attention like Dumbledore suggested before I'll make sure Filch and all the Slytherins are on the case. Capiche?"

Number Foggy: Train everyone. Make it so the entire room sighes every time he enters.

Number Foggy-wun: Constantly stare at him, with your mouth open slightly.

Number Foggy-true: Drool.

(this one sould be fifty one --orty or was forty four)

Number Fifty-One: Ask him if you can get a kleenex for your drooling. Unless he has something to use in place of that- mutter a tongue would suffice.

Actually yours should be forty-one, MM. Anyway, back to the not-number usage.

FlourT-True: Ask him if it's true what they say about Slytherin men, then wink.

Sorry guys... I was completely off-- sorry!

Number Fo T Tree: Beg him to take you to Disney Land so you could laugh at the "muggle magic" that is supposed to exist there. You already go you a house rented. For a month.

[Ima use 'forty', so I don't get confused ^_^]

Number Forty-for: Make him pay for the house

Number Forty-hive: buy decorations for the house... also with his money. Try to cinvince him that you think you both should just live there. Together.

number fyorty-sick: If he says no, kiddnap him and keep him in your basement.

Number Forty-Seven: Turn off all the lights in the basement and randomly throw things into the basement every so often. Don't forget to throw the refrigerator!

Number forty- ate: Give him a stress relief thing, tell him it's a jube.

Number Forty-Nonagon has non angles: Ask him the scientific name for everything. Including toothpaste, a pencil, and celery.

Number Fifty: Make a deal out of the way he swirls his erlenmeyer flasks, and tell him how the movement turns you on. Really, really on.